Good Old Fashioned Family Violence

I had no idea the Nintendo Wii was an Al Qaeda training device, but I learned the hard way at the hands of my very own son.

First he kicked, strangled, punched, and shot my monkey (I was the monkey) while I fumbled with the "Nunchuk" and remote.


"Push 'A' to kick and 'B' to strangle," he said while kicking my revived monkey off a tree branch and laughing as it fell.

Next we "played" an army game involving tanks in which my son and other rogue tanks repeatedly blew me up.


"Do I press 'C' to deploy the nuclear weapon?" I wondered.

When I huffed in frustration, my son said, "Don't worry, mom. This time we're on the same team. I'm the blue tank and you're the red tank."

Then, laughing, he aimed his blue gun at my red tank and blew me up again.

"Kids like violence, mom," my daughter explained as I expressed my shock and horror at the nature of these games.

"Yeah, mom. Violence is good for kids," my son added.

I didn't know how to respond in the face of such ruthless little chips off the ol' block, but then it occurred to me: it was time for a spanking.

"Wii tennis, anyone?"